What can we learn about fatherhood from Captain Fantastic

I recently watched Captain Fantastic after a good amount of our friends recommended it to us (probably because he converted a school bus into a tiny house). I was pleasantly surprised by the humorous and thoughtful film. Most modern movies are flat and try not to offend anyone and don’t really take on tough topics but this one portrays the struggles of parenting and the human condition quite accurately.

The basic idea is that Viggo (Ben Cash) and his wife have decided to raise their 6 kids in the PNW woods while teaching them outdoor survival skills and giving them a top notch homeschooling education. They abhor capitalism and decide to stick it to the man by being completely self reliant. I won’t ruin the movie but obviously there is some conflict with the ‘real world’ and they have to adapt to and overcome new obstacles as they enter civilization.

Masculine Parenting

It was refreshing to see the portrayal of a truly masculine presnece on screen especially one raising and caring for children. The movie starts with Viggo raising his children alone, running them through a number of physical and mental exercises. He pushes them hard and challenges them to be their best but also shows tender care for each of his 6 children. The modern world seems to want men to parent like women. The ‘gentle parenting’ movement, while it has some positives, seems to imply that the masculine energy is not needed in parenting. Viggo shows us what it can look like for a father to step into his role as the teacher, provider and protector. As a father, it inspired me to be more involved in my children’s education. It also reminded me that children will rise to the expectations that we put on them. Viggo is not harsh and critical and short-tempered but he is exacting and demanding. He confidently leads his family and they thrive under his leadership.

Home Schooling

The other thing I loved seeing on screen was a badass version of homeschooling. Our family subscribes to the wild and free method of homeschooling and so it was awesome to see a version of this going on in film. Granted, it is a bit more intense than what we do but it is a much better representation than the dorky Little House on the Prairie version that is often portrayed in films. I don’t subscribe to all of Viggo’s philosophical and political ideals but I did love the school that he created for his kids. I’m inspired to learn more about wilderness survival and teach those skills to my children as they grow older.

The tension between ideals and reality

The film captures well the tension of parenting. Viggo and his wife have high ideals and they stick to them dogmatically in the beginning but as the movie goes on, Viggo softens and adjusts to reality. His children realize that they are equipped to live in the woods but have trouble connecting with others and socializing. They express their dislike of this and after some soul searching, they both find a happy medium. The kids come to appreciate what their father has given them and Viggo adjusts their lifestyle to provide them with more social interaction by apparently enrolling them in public school in the end.

Parenting is a tough journey and we all have high ideals for our children. We do our best to stay true to our values but sometimes we need to adapt and rework those visions as our children grow. Viggo sets a great example for parents on how to adjust and interact with your growing children’s needs. The film is honest about the challenges of parenting and shows the beautiful give and take that is required to raise children.

Conclusion

Overall, I loved this movie. I loved seeing a strong dad struggle to lead and love his family. I saw myself and my own journey portrayed by Viggo as he struggled with loss and his desire to raise his children better than the status-quo. I am inspired to be a better dad, to expect and call my children to more and to love and serve my wife well. While being fun and entertaining, this movie also tells a bigger story of what our children need from us as fathers. I highly recommend all fathers watch this and answer the call to step up our fathering.